Sunday, January 17, 2016

The Calming Effects of Yarn

I was semi-voluntarily laid off last June. I have applied to so many jobs since then, and I've even had numerous interviews. But no offers. My unemployment benefits have been exhausted. I never expected to be unemployed for more than 6 months.  Emotions are running high right now.

A Verb for Keeping Warm Pioneer
I'm angry at anyone who thinks someone who is unemployed can just "go get a job" but is too lazy because they are getting "handouts." I am frustrated that I've spent a lot of money and time getting to where I am in my career but now I can't get hired, despite that Master's degree and 15 years of experience. I'm scared about whether I can manage to extend my savings to cover more than two more months. I'm disappointed in myself for not managing my money better. I'm confused about what I can do to improve my chances of getting a job. I'm dreading the thought of going back into a minimum-wage job (especially in this very expensive city) like retail (is this what my degree was for?). The strongest emotion I feel right now, however, is thankful to have a partner who will support me during this hard time. I can't imagine having to face this alone.

November Leaves
A couple weeks ago I was struggling with my emotions after reading up on current events. The situation in Oregon at the wildlife refuge has upset me beyond reason. It has highlighted some deep philosophical differences between me and some of the people I care deeply about, and that realization has knocked me over with sadness.

Simple House Slippers (for me!)
One thing that has kept me from sinking into a dark place has been pictures of yarn. I was reeling from the news (just general news, not anything in particular) when I took a break to scroll through Instagram. The first two pictures were of handspun yarn. All my stress melted away. I'd never felt something like that--a visceral calm from looking at a picture. Since then I've tried to temper my news reading with pictures of yarn. I have been trying to stop myself from compulsively checking Facebook and Twitter, since so much of what is posted there is news about whatever terrible thing is happening (and where I see the opinions of people I care about but don't agree with, which is something that has been hurting me lately. I just haven't been able to let that roll off my back like usual).

A Verb for Keeping Warm Flock (the yarn is much bluer in real life)
I would like to follow more people who post beautiful pictures of yarn, so if you have suggestions, please let me know. Instagram is a much happier place than other social media sites. Nearly every picture is of children I care about, cats, or knitting related. Not a bad place to live right now. Find me there at everywhereknitting.

Tartara



1 comment:

aimee said...

though i also hate that you are in this struggle (along with so many wonderful capable people), i love that you are turning to yarn! i'll send you a link about reading less of the bad stuff...and sending lots of hugs.